Sunday 20 May 2012

Homophobic Will Smith Gives A Backhand


The renowned actor known for his Men in Black (MiB) Hollywood hit was yesterday appalled by Ukrainian television channel 1+1 reporter, Vitalii Sediuk who apparently tried to kiss him while on the red carpet MiB premiere in Moscow.

The reporter was dressed in a charming white suit like a male-bride would on his/her wedding day and motioned for a hug from Will Smith, which he graciously consented to. Obviously the hug was just a prequel to the reporter’s hidden agenda as he immediately tried to catch the star’s lips in a mouldering kiss!

It is unclear what Sediuk hoped to achieve, (a gay fantasy with the Bel-Air prince maybe) but what he really got was a light but assertive back-hand from Smith. Sediuk seemed quite perplexed as though the star had overreacted when all he wanted was a ‘red carpet moment’ with him.

A few seconds later Smith stated with a jovial temperament that Sediuk was lucky he didn’t sucker-punch him.

This same reporter had a run-in with Madonna in September when he presented her with a bouquet of purple hydrangeas, referring to Madonna as “my princess.” Little did he know that she detested the flora and she more than stated this when she clearly rebuffed him on that occasion.

It is clear the reporter yet again failed to do his homework on the likes and dislikes of his celebrity crushes. Who knows, he may act the fool again sooner than later. It’s good though, to know Will Smith is on the side of the un-queer. I do hope it wasn’t just eye-service for the red carpet.

Tuesday 8 May 2012

TAKING ANOTHER ONE FOR THE TEAM

The Nigerian people are no doubt a resilient bunch of survivors and we have done well to show this time and again in enduring series of dire measures meted upon us by our leaders, not just in this political dispensation but as long as we care to remember. Apparently history must be copiously iterated and we must continuously find a way to ‘break the surface’. Seems to me that the proverbial saying that we are profoundly established in the art (and act) of “suffering and smiling” has stuck with us for good, even more so after it was sonorously delivered by the apolitical afro-beat legend and prolific government critic Fela Anikulapo Kuti in one of his songs. Nothing can be more intrinsic in the human nature than the ability to adapt to the toughest of circumstances in a bid to survive and we Nigerians are so blessed in harnessing that ability when the need arises, be it outside of our own motherland; in the face of discrimination, malicious degradation and the most unfavourable physical and environmental conditions or at home where we are constantly victimised by our leaders; superimposed on us by politically corrupt manipulations or self-inflicted by nepotistic choices we are gullibly guided to make. 

It would be safe to say that since before the 19th century to the mid-20th century the survival instinct of man could be properly classified as a ‘black thing’, a dark memorial of who we were, are and have become, yet colourful as an aspect of our negritude. But here we are in the 21st century, decades away from brazen dehumanization of the African continent, and Nigeria, being the purported giants of Africa, 160 million strong in citizenry rewrites her history in the blood and sweat of millions of toiling souls, surrounded by ample natural resources which they have no control over, now redefining what was once a ‘black thing’ to be a ‘Nigerian thing’!

It is an exemplary paradox that a country like ours, blessed with so much from natural resources to human capacity can also be jinxed with developmental retrogression. Even 52 years after basking in the discovery of our staggering wealth, more than half of the population is still swimming in penury, most yet unaware of the possibility of a basic standard of living far beyond their hopes and dreams, which should accrue to them by virtue of their citizenship rather than by merit.

Ignorance, they say is bliss. Well, in this case there can be no bliss for the common man if he chooses a life of mediocrity, subconsciously refusing to know more of how he is being ruled and instead opting for a dedication of self to a lifetime of struggles in a rat race whose finish-line is the gate of a cemetery. Depressingly shocking it was to me when earlier this year on engaging some supposedly enlightened compatriots on the issue of the subsidy removal which almost saw our dear nation on the brink of anarchy, more than a few blatantly exercised a monumental level of distorted reasoning especially regarding its ill-timing. Even more shocking was their unhinged advocacy for the palliative measures proposed by the government to cushion the effect of the subsidy removal. Four months since the implementation of these palliatives, can anyone rightly state without bias that the effects of the subsidy removal were cushioned, even if like our dear President, that person is stuffed full to the brim with cassava bread and consequently suffers mental impairment?

We all know that what has occurred is only a ‘survival adjustment’ of the people to a new level of hardship since salaries didn’t increase, jobs were not created, the power sector didn’t improve, deflation of the economy did not occur...as a matter of fact, things regressed geometrically- the implementation of the new minimum wage still remains an issue in many states, the prices of goods and services in all spheres were at least doubled, the spate of terrorism has become an issue of national security, cases of graft has never been more rampant and the power sector has been as stagnant as a cesspool of putrid water ideal for breeding healthy mosquitoes!

Apparently, the government of President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan assumed the people he had vowed to ‘serve’ deserved more. Hence we got served on the first day of 2012 by our dear President with a breath of ‘fresh air’ when it was announced that the pump price of fuel had been pegged at N141/litre from N65/litre. As I now understand it, those who willfully left the comfort of their houses on the aegis of the Save Nigeria Group to occupy Nigeria really came out to sniff as much of the ‘fresh air’ only to go back to their deoxygenated dwellings when they had had their fill (or should I say when the government thought the people had had enough of the ‘fresh air’).

According to the President, the people of Nigeria were required to ‘take one for the team’ by enduring the effects of the subsidy removal while looking at the long term benefits it would bring. In his ever-piercing words he said, “It is a sacrifice Nigerians must be willing to make to save our perishing economy.” So at the end of the day, by draconian means and closed door enticements our wings were clipped and a compromise was made. Win/win some might say, but alas; it is only the voice of adaptation whispering deception. For by 1st of June, six months after the subsidy removal, the people will again be asked to take another one for the team, to again ‘inhale‘ the fresh air of the GEJ-lead government by accepting with enduring faith the increment in electricity tariffs so as to encourage investors to see the industry for what it is; a gold mine waiting to be explored and exploited, another pillaging scam the people must finance for our collective good, the good of the industry and the good of our dear nation Nigeria.
 
In Addendum...
Just a few days ago, (as a palliative I would assume) the ever-bamboozling President 'launched' energy-saving bulbs into the Nigerian market! Isn't that just wonderful!!! How lucky we are to have a President who is concerned about our power consumption, so much so that a 'feat' as trivial as introducing energy-saving bulbs into the Nigerian market could not be delegated to the Power Minister! Well, for those who do not already know it, these energy-saving bulbs have been in the Nigerian market long before now. The bone of contention as regards this 'cutting-edge achievement' by the President is how power-saving bulbs will increase the power production and ensure regular supply. I am tempted to ponder on the scientific logic of improving the quality of electricity supply by utilizing these bulbs...only I already know the result of such reckless mental exertion. Then again, I remember these bulbs have been here long before now and it didn't make that magic happen all that time, so why now?

What a metaphorical contradiction that a political party well known for its mantra of 'power to the people' really has no plans to give Power to the people! It's still very vivid, the baffling financial figures which was purportedly spent on the power sector during ex-President Obasanjo's tenure. Enough to rebuild whole cities from the ground up some might agree, yet nothing was achieved in the sector- a whooping $10 billion and nothing to show for it, not even on the short term! Now thinking about it, I wonder how Nigerians were so gullible to vote in another PDP member as the nation's leader in 2011. Oh, I remember...they didn't vote the party, they voted the individual!

Lastly, for all the nepotistic supporters of GEJ prior to his failures as a national leader, I have a simple question; "how fresh is the air around you"? But sadly, I might as well answer the question myself seeing how rhetorical it has become...since the unfortunate reality is that the rest of the anti-GEJ masses termed the minority are doomed to live by the dubious decision that the majority made. But in the spirit of sportsmanship, patriotism and unity, I hope we are wiser today than we were yesterday, for our level of political intelligence, collectively averaged will determine the future choices we make and ultimately the future of our dear nation, Nigeria.

Follow Ari ‘X’ Steve on twitter @iamXAri